So, I’ve been staring at this screen for a while now. I’ve been trying to come up with a topic to write about but the few things that have come up that I’d like to spill onto the screen would only come out sounding like a temper tantrum and usually when I feel like doing such things it’s because I’m feeling particularly hormonal, if you get my drift (I’m pretty certain there’s some guys out there reading my blog, so I won’t force the issue).
Moving on. I don’t have anything particular to say except that I hate being the center of gossip. I hate it when something important is going on in my life and I want to talk about it, and then eventually everybody knows about it, which makes my soul feel dirty.
Sometimes I think that I’m part of the problem. I can’t help but talk about myself, I’m human and I wonder if I’m only feeding the flames. So, I’ve been trying to control my impulses to tell everybody about my business, knowing how I feel afterwards. But sometimes that’s hard to do.
Like when I went out Saturday. I was happy about going out and it kind of showed when I was at work, enough so that this lady asked me what was up, so I told her. And then before I knew it, everybody else working in my department heard about it. And it made me feel awkward because I don’t want to date the man. Nice guy, but I don’t want to have anything to do with him in the dating sense. But now everybody’s feeling quite certain we’re going to get together, which happened last night at work. Now I wish I didn’t say anything because how can I make it obvious that I’m not interested because I’m trying to see someone else without making that last part obvious?
I get myself into some messes and now I have to figure out how to patch it up. I don’t want to get angry, but neither do I want to be frivelous and encourage the teasing and the flames. Maybe a simple “I don’t want to talk about it” will suffice.
Me: 0, Human Nature: 1.