For the past few months or so, I’ve been reading a man’s blog about dating, relationships, and modern chivalry. There have been many posts in which I felt empathetic towards. Things like how men and women should behave towards each other, especially when dating or thinking about becoming serious. It made me like the blog enough to follow it (obviously).
But today I read something from his blog that made me step back a little. He said that the “I don’t need no man” philosophy is killing relationships and making men feel low. He also made the statement that men know women don’t need us, but want us to want them.
While this is a true statement and I’m not undermining relationships or men, I feel like it’s a blanket stereotype over women who choose to remain single. I’m sure there’s women who say they don’t need or want a man because they’re bitter about what life’s given them. I know because I used to be one of those people. But now that I’ve allowed myself to grow, heal and explore myself as a single woman, I’ve discovered how happy I am as being single.
I don’t hate men, but neither do I want to be in a relationship. I like being who I am without being attached to someone else. I don’t want to have to ask my boyfriend about his plans before making my own. I want to make my own decisions and take off when I need and want to without having to compromise. I want to be free with no strings attached.
I think there should be some respect involved when it comes to whether or not a person wants to be in a relationship or stay single. Some of us are perfectly happy to be where we are without a partner in our lives. If a woman says she doesn’t want to be in a relationship, respect her decision to be single. You don’t know her story as to why she is where she is in her life. Don’t make her feel guilty about her choices in the dating world by saying she’s killing relationships by her choice in being single. Just support her in her choices and encourage her to be who she is and grow to be an even better person that she is without impeding her in her journey.
That’s all I and other women ask.