Red Tom of the Hills

I’ve been sporadic with my music playing. I went two days without practicing and then for only ten minutes a day for a few days. It’s not good but I knew I wanted to bite the bullet and learn how play melody and I didn’t want to learn it. Someone was giving me horror stories about how playing melody was only for “advanced” players and I was scared to start trying.

But I finally did it because some other musicians encouraged me to just jump right in and try it out. Anyone who tells you that something’s for an advanced player only isn’t being very helpful. So the other day I watched a little bit of the melody for Cindy and when I got the idea of how it was supposed to go I branched off and found an Irish reel called “Red Tom of the Hills.” There’s a guy on YouTube who shows people how to play melody to various Irish songs and this one was the first one in his “for beginners” playlist. I printed off the tabs he provided and listened to him play it a couple times and followed along a little bit and then branched off and just followed the tabs sheet.

I’m not good at reading tabs (or regular music to be honest) but I think it’s my security blanket because when someone is showing how to play it, I like to follow along so I can get the hang of it. I need to learn how to listen to a song and learn how to pick it out, but obviously I’m not that brave yet. At least I’m trying out a combination of reading tabs and listening to it at the same time, right? In the very least I’m listening to how it’s supposed to sound like first so I know I’m doing it right while I’m practicing?

I’ve been watching more mandolin players on YouTube. It’s fun to watch how quick their fingers dance across the fretboard. I want to be that quick one day. And hopefully it’ll come sooner rather than later.

Coming Round the Mountain.

I learned a new song yesterday, “Comin’ Round the Mountain.”

The person who arranged it had it both in the Key of G and Key of C and I tried out both of them. I liked the sound of it in G better but C was easier because I didn’t have to do D in the middle of the song. It’s more awkward than the other chords that I’ve learned so I have to pay more attention but it will get easier, I’m sure.

I’m definitely procrastinating on learning melody, but at the moment I don’t care. As long as I learn a couple songs and practice scales occasionally I’m good. I have a feeling melody is on the scales that I’m learning but I haven’t made the leap yet.

My callouses are coming and I can feel the hardness of them when I type and they still hurt a little bit. I wish we didn’t need callouses to be able to play but that’s the way to go. It’s so weird to have them on a couple fingers but not on others.

I have “Man of Constant Sorrow” to learn. Now that will be a disappointment if I can’t learn the chords to and even the melody. For now I’ll learn the chords.

The Pain of Growth.

My fingers feel broken today.

They were sore when I came home from mandolin practice but I woke up really sore this morning. My fingers hurt when I type. They gently throb when I lift them up, when I gently touch the cup.

I want it to end. I know they are not used to playing strings and when they get tough they’ll no longer hurt. Hurting means I’m getting there. Hurting means I pressed my fingers to the fret just right.

I’m just impatient and I don’t like pain. Does anyone truly like pain? Pain is gain and in this case it’s true.

The Flow of Writing.

Keep writing until the writing feels natural. Keep writing until the creativity flows and it’s not something to consciously think about. It doesn’t matter what others think as long as you keep writing. The readers will follow if the writing keeps coming.

The mantra is told and re-told until I’m almost convinced. But then I think of all the things that could be wrong about what I’m told. The wording is awkward. The opinions aren’t fully formulated. I don’t feel passionate about what I’m trying to say. I didn’t get the ideas across. The doubts roll over and multiply until they fill my head with uncertainties.

But I keep writing. And writing. And then I write some more. The habit of writing comes over me until the thought of not doing so is unfathomable. I can’t break away from this new found partner that I found in writing. I reach for the next word; my fingers curl tightly around them and pull it down to me. There’s another word after that and I reach for that as well.

I feel the pull of my shoulder blades, but I can’t think of stopping. To stop would mean to stop this newfound flow that I’ve found. Is it any good? I don’t really know. But I can’t stop now.

A Writer’s Inspiration

The one question that people love to ask writers is this:

Where do you get your inspiration to write?

I think a lot of people ask this because they secretly believe that successful writers have divine inspiration from God and only those with such inspiration can write. I think there is natural talent in some people and there are those who feel pulled towards putting pen to paper.

To be honest though, I think that whether or not you have natural talent is nothing if you don’t sit down at your desk and just write. The more you write, the better you become and the easier the ideas flow.

This might not sound glamorous at all, but this is the experience that I’ve had when it comes to writing.

There have been times where I haven’t written for months at a time and when I tried to get back into writing and just pull something out of thin air, I couldn’t do it. It made me not want to write and then I was back at square one.

Once I took a class called “Enhancing Your Creativity.” We used a book by Julia Cameron called The Artist’s Way and two of the requirements were to write every day and go on an artist’s date once a week. An artist’s date is to go off on your own for at least an hour or more and do want *you* want to do in solitude. I found that my mind worked more, constantly thinking about things and when I did write stories, it was easier to get them out.

I flip flop between liking and hating Cameron’s book, but I do agree with the fact that if you write every day or work on the craft of your choice every day, then it’s easier to start and finish your work. You don’t need to wait for a divine inspiration. You don’t need to have an idea that’s perfect. It’s not going to look like Shakespeare in the first draft. All you have to do is to keep writing, keep thinking, and eventually you’ll be on the road to where you want to be creative wise.

Hard writing.

Writing takes practice.

You can’t put a story down to paper and expect a masterpiece to stare back at you. And yet we expect that to happen every time we pull out our pen and paper. Whenever I write, I write a paragraph, a page, maybe even two and then I stop and stare at it in disbelief because I didn’t write it like I could see it in my head.

Too much exposition. Too much explaining. Not enough action, not enough show and tell.

I look at my words in disbelief and I want to tear out the pages in anger and frustration because it hasn’t reached where I want it to be just yet. And it won’t. Not just yet, anyway. Because sometimes you need to get the idea down first and then look back on it after some time has passed.

Sometimes we just need to put down our ideas down first. Oftentimes it’s just a paragraph or a few lines of dialogue or exposition. We need to get it out so we don’t forget.

I’m learning not to get frustrated. I’m writing in a composition notebook when the ideas hit me. I write. It’s not always the full story, just parts of it. It’s so hard though not to pull it all out and start from page one. My fingers itch to just pull them all out. But I don’t think I have just yet. I want to keep it all in one little space. Perhaps if I keep writing, the ideas will keep flowing. I want to write a book someday and if I don’t keep pushing myself, then I won’t get to that point.

One day I’ll look up from my little composition notebook and say, “This is the idea that I want to follow through with.”

Then I’ll rush to the computer, pull open a word document and edit and maybe write some more. That’s all I want to do. Continue writing and follow my dreams. But first, I need to practice. First, I need to keep writing in spite of all my insecurities. If I keep writing Captain Critic will dissolve into nothing.

Shame and Religion.

I don’t talk a lot about being a practicing Christian very much. If I talk about it with non-Christians, they think I’m too religious, narrow minded and conservative. If I talk about it with Christians, they think I’m not being Christian enough and try to get me to church and be more involved in church activities and believe in certain things because “the Bible said so.” Frankly, both sides make me feel inadequate and less of a person. To shame someone because of their beliefs or to practice a religion in a way that is out of the norm for most followers is not okay in my book.

I’m not an expert or anything, but it appears that is the problem with people these days. We stereotype whole people for one aspect of themselves and judge them for the actions of others who put themselves in those groups. I shouldn’t be ashamed to want to be a Christian, but neither should I be ashamed for not being involved with the church or aligning myself with people who need my voice. Both sides need to calm down and let each other be. Because who wants to be shamed for having one set of beliefs over another?